Showing Up with Confidence on Video with Amy Lokken
This transcript was created using AI. Please forgive any discrepencies.
[Intro] Welcome to Easy Style with Sami. I’m your host Sami Bedell-Mulhern. Each episode, I invite a friend, family member or colleague or just someone I’ve met on this journey called life to come and share their personal style and approach to business, parenting, life and everything in between. You’ll hear motivational and inspirational stories that will help you refine and build your own personal style. Remember, style is easy when it comes from within.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Welcome to another episode of easy style with Sammy. Today, my guest is Amy Lokken. Amy, thank you so much for being here today.
[Amy Lokken] Oh, send me thank you so much for having me, I look forward to our conversation.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Well, and this is one of me too. But this is one of the things that I love about this podcast is that we just met through a mutual colleague of ours and like, that’s the power and the beauty of what we’re doing here and the stories we’re sharing, because if I hadn’t put out something talking about how we’re looking for guests, for this podcast, we never would have met. And now we’ve made all sorts of other new connections. So I’m really excited to chat more today.
Amy Lokken 1:09
Me too. And I love that it’s all about connections and building those relationships. And that is really, truly the fun thing about this. I love that you’re doing this.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Yeah, well, good. Well, thanks for being here. So we’re gonna talk about video today, because I feel like, you know, we’ve come through the era where we were forced to be on video more, we’ve all kind of adapted in certain ways, shapes and forms, the tech has adapted in all these different shapes and forms. But you’ve been somebody who has been around video for a long time. So why don’t you kind of just tell people a little bit about you? Who’s Ami? And why is video the thing that you have just become so passionate about?
[Amy Lokken] Yeah, you know, well, a little bit about me as I do come from a industrial design backgrounds. So form and function have always been a really huge aspect of my life. From a very young age, my dad was the first person to teach me how to weld somewhere around that six, seven year old range. Yeah, just really always love to create things. And, you know, my ultimate goal of our definition of success in my daily life, and my career is did I leave people places and things better than I found them. So fast forward to the modern day world of Lights, Camera Action, which is really where we found ourselves comfortable or not, here we are, and these platforms, and this is not going away. So honestly, it came down to I really felt as though I had a responsibility to help people start to regain that confidence as if they had the confidence that they had, back when they were walking physically into physical locations. Honestly, the camera is no different. It just we have to think differently about it. And, you know, for somebody who has, you know, talked on stages, and, you know, been on a TV streaming show for a few seasons, and have her own show and all those things. I’m not immune to the camera, and but I’ve also been there like we’ve all been there, we all still have those little jitters of, oh, I have to turn this camera on. But if we try to think differently, a little bit about it, that being on stage, you’re talking to a mass of people, and you’re pulling from that energy. And when you have to turn on the camera, we all get a little nervous, like why is that? And it’s much more intimate conversation. If you think through it a little differently of when you turn on the camera, you are having a one on one conversation with the audience on the other end of that lens.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Well, some of those conversations are like like you said the energy like some of those conversations are like we are both on videos, we’re talking to each other. But sometimes it’s a Facebook Live or it’s a LinkedIn live and like maybe people are in the comments but you’re literally just kind of talking to nobody like I find I love to do interview style podcast so much more than the solo ones because when I do the solo ones, it just is like it just doesn’t like I know the content is still good but it doesn’t feel the same.
[Amy Lokken] It doesn’t it doesn’t feel the same because you’re you have nobody’s energy but yourself that you’re bringing to that moment but Get you have to convey that your energy through that camera lens? And how do you do that when it’s hard, trust me when they’re on a regular basis, you know, and they think it’s really about getting, you know, confident with yourself a huge part of that is making sure that you, you know, the whole Lights, Camera Action is really my, you know, my thing because you have to have good lighting, you have to have a decent camera and more important and just as importantly, as the camera quality, you have to have the right angle. And, and then you have to know who you are, and what you stand for. And that’s kind of that action of, you know, going for it. But when you have those things in place, then all you have to do is show up and be you, you know this kind of pulled out that overthinking aspect and quality but making sure that your surroundings your environment is a reflection of you and that you’re able to gain that energy as if you were speaking to that audience that really is on the other side of that lens.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Well, and I love your holistic approach, because it’s almost like what came first the chicken or the egg? It’s like, Yes, I need my confidence. But having that physical space set up in the way that I feel comfortable helps me build that confidence. So like, you know, where do we start? Like, can we start with maybe just showing up and trying and working through that before we go and invest in equipment? And I know the equipment doesn’t have to be expensive? But like, where do you if we’re trying to figure out our style and how we want to show up and what we want that to look like that’s physical and, you know, mental and emotional. Like, where do we start with that?
[Amy Lokken] Yeah, absolutely. You know, honestly, it’s, you know, lighting, you know, first and foremost, we all have some window someplace. So, yes, natural lighting it we look, we all look fantastic. And natural lighting. The one thing I will say, you and I are here in the Midwest. Now, your lighting is
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] very gray outside.
[Amy Lokken] Yes, it is. And natural lighting is great. But it’s also the most inconsistent lighting. So but if you can get in front of a window and give yourself some natural light. And you know today yep, I have a window I have southern exposure, it gives me great light, but it is cloudy as heck today. And that sunny gonna come out for I don’t know how. However, I do have a supplement, I have a secondary, which is honestly a ring light 18 inch ring light that’s under 100 bucks, you don’t you can utilize a lamp that you have in your home like it, you don’t need to overcomplicate it, but you want to be well lit, because your audience needs to see you in order to trust you. So that is honestly utilize the stuff, curate the things around you in your home that you already have. You know, so let’s say you you are able to put yourself in front of a window or near a window to give yourself that reflection. Background, a simple blank wall does a world of difference. You don’t need, you know all the bells and whistles. In fact, the less you can have in your background, the better because it allows you to be the center of attention and our human eye moves in what’s called a rule of thirds. And the more you’re able to allow just the human eye to just naturally move around your space and not get stuck. But always bring the center of that attention back to you you’re going to be you know, much more credible across the lens because there is no distraction. And it says that you really do know what you’re talking about. And that’s I do believe where that inner style comes from and how it you know, when we think about our, our values, our core values, and what it’s like to work with somebody. Those are one in the same. So if we just remove the ego, like if we remove our ego out of it, and remember that we are showing up for the person or the people on the other side of that lens. Like we value them. Yeah. Then everything else just kind of falls into place.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Well, I think there’s something to be said to to the purpose of what it is we’re showing a fun video for right so showing up for a podcast interview versus like maybe I’m doing a Facebook live in my Facebook group that’s a little bit more just kind of be intimate and you know, more casual, maybe right? Or maybe I am recording for somebody’s summit or event like I think really understanding where you’re showing up for. And not overthinking what that looks like, you might need to put a little bit more prep into something that’s a more professional showcase. But don’t not show up on your social media channels or whatever, because you feel like it’s not perfect, right? And that’s kind of a combo of the space versus the mindset.
[Amy Lokken] Right, exactly. And I think when we, when we start categorizing why, and getting real with why we’re on certain, certain platforms, and we’re doing certain things, then we identify, it’s, it’s like, when you think of a movie set, or you know, a talk show, or if we were doing this, you know, literally on TV someplace in the middle of a news, whatever, everybody has different sets. So think about your evening news. Your your main top stories are in one area, you might have an interview, which is a little bit more casual, and you’re sitting on a couch and a chair or whatever, you know, then you’re doing XYZ and people are standing, and they’re standing behind a desk, or they’re standing in front of a group, big screen, or whatever it is, everybody, but you know what’s happening, as an audience, as a viewer, you know, what’s happening in each of those segments, and you know, what you should be prepared and ready for some of them analogy. Yeah, some things are much more buttoned up. Other things are much more casual. I, for instance, when I am doing a recording for a summit or a masterclass, or whatever it is, depending upon what it is, I will often be standing, I have a standing desk, I have a much higher chair. Today, I’m a little back a little further, we’re having a conversation. To me, it’s a little more casual, I’m on the edge of my seat, my legs are crossed, but I am fully dressed shoes on and everything. Because as if we were meeting in person, this is how I would. And I think that’s the missing point when it comes to how do you translate yourself through a camera lens, no different than if you were showing up in person.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] I love that I don’t have I have leggings on, I don’t have shoes on because I don’t wear shoes in my house. But I love that because I think it’s true. Like when we don’t. Like I can tell my energy is just different in my work when I’m like, whatever, I don’t have any meetings today. So I’m just going to throw on, you know, throw up my hair and a messy bun and I’m just gonna throw in sweats like, you know, you kind of slouch more like you just don’t show up differently versus when I know I’m going to be recording and or have meetings and I need to kind of show up looking a little bit more professional. It does change your energy in the way that you approach what you’re doing in general.
[Amy Lokken] Yeah. 1,000%. So if you really want to change your energy stand up, I don’t even care for
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] it. I’m standing right now.
[Amy Lokken] I did. Yep. And I had you I actually could tell you were. But I also knew that, you know, that would also be kind of similar to depending upon the quote unquote set and the layout of the conversation. It wouldn’t be unusual for that to happen.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] But two reasons. There’s two are sorry to interrupt you. There’s two reasons. One is that I feel like it keeps me more engaged. It’s more comfortable. But also talking about set. Like below here is not anything anybody needs to see on camera. So like on the background. So it’s also like to your point, it’s kind of the whole thing, it’s it puts me in the right mental space, but it also makes me feel more comfortable that what you’re seeing behind me while it’s not perfect, is a heck of a lot better than what you would see if I was sitting
[Amy Lokken] with you your postures also different, you know, you’re the host of this, you should have, you know, kind of that stature. And again, it’s no different than we first met you were setting when we had our, you know, conversation or whatever. And that was a different, you know, segment into the whole conversation and it’s not about being perfect. I think you know, before it pops back on my head but just start like no one’s perfect. We’re never going to be perfect because we’re human, like no one is perfect. But you can go from good to great. And then Excellent. You like excellent is achievable. You know, it’s about showing up and you know what I I actually don’t typically wear shoes in my home either. So what I’ve learned is I do have a few pairs of shoes that I kind of keep in my office underneath my desk there, you know, I’ll be honest, I used to rock heels like no one’s done it. I don’t do those so well today. They’re now my city.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] So they make you feel fancy.
[Amy Lokken] Exactly. But sometimes they give me that. They just give me that, even if I’m not wearing them. And I can see them past my camera lens. And go, Yeah, that’s the energy I want to bring to this moment in time. I may not be wearing them. But I can feel and I can pull off that energy. So yeah, it’s it’s just these little tiny things, but just start, I don’t even care if it’s about finding your own style. Just you have an idea. That’s just like, wacky. And you’re like, I wonder No, just talk about it. Just tell somebody about it. It may not come to fruition, exactly how you see it, or the same process. But you, but you’re talking about it, you’re getting it out there, you’re gaining that energy and that excitement for it. So, you know, we all start somewhere. It’s the matter of art in order to get better at something.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Okay, so I want to touch on this before we wrap things up, because I’m so glad you’ve kind of brought us to this part of the conversation and that we have these ideas we want. We’re okay, I’m like, I’m ready. I know who I am. I want to show up. And then we start like, Okay, well, I want to see how everybody else is doing it. Because I want to make sure that I’m doing it the right way. And so you watch people that are quote unquote, more successful than you or whatnot. And then we get like all in our heads and we’re like, Nope, I can’t do it. I can’t be myself, I can’t turn the button on and start. So like what advice or tips would you give people to kind of pull back out of that and kind of drop that what the turnout is imposter syndrome?
[Amy Lokken] Well, you know what the imposter syndrome is real. First and foremost, I 100%. Ly believe that it at every growth stage you have, you will enter back into a new level of imposter syndrome. So first and foremost, you just need to like, own that, like, own your space. Everybody is at a different point. And if you’re looking for some looking to somebody else, as kind of like that guideline, you you’ll get a you’ll never you’ll never push the button. Because you will always find something, something that’s going to hold you back because you’re not there. Well, there they are. They’re in a completely different realm than you because you’re not them. And it really is about it. Yeah, it’s about going inward and going. Okay. So every reality is perception. Perception is reality. So once you just like wrap your head around that and say, okay, everyone’s going to view something from a different perspective. You could be thinking, you are like, not hitting anything out there. And you’re not achieved. Like you’re like the worst person on board. And they’re, I can guarantee you is somebody who is going to come across that who’s going to watch it who’s going to be on the other side of that lens that’s going wow. Like, I want that. Like, I want that confidence. I want that style, that energy. And you know what, they will find that but because of you because you owned your space. You know, I love fashion. I hate shopping. So bizarre. I know, it’s been 15 years in the shopping center industry doing design. But I know that when I feel like I look good, I do better. Yeah. And then if I’m going to achieve my success on a daily basis, did I leave people places and things better than I found them. The only way I am ever going to achieve that is if I get up. I dress up and I show up and I’m not doing it for me but I’m doing it for those in my realm.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Well and I love everything that you said. I like I do digital marketing for nonprofits and build websites, I work in direct sales, you’re in industrial design, and you coach people on video, like nothing that we do is unique. Like, there are millions of us out in this world that are doing the things that we do. So I think go back and listen to that, what, what Amy just said, if you’re feeling like, well, I can’t show up, like, that’s more reason why you need to show up as yourself because that is what sets you apart. That is what makes people feel good. It’s what allows people to connect to you on a personal level. So I think that’s just brilliant. What you said, because who you are, and the way that you approach your work is unique, even if you feel like you’re one of a million fish in the sea.
[Amy Lokken] Well, and I think, you know, for a lot of my clients that come to me that I work with, and have worked with over the years that are starting out brand new, and they’re really trying to like figure out what their brand is and who they are, and what that looks like. And, you know, a lot of branders, and marketers will tell people to go look at the competition, you know,
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] hold that up, they’re, like, back that bus up,
Amy Lokken 21:14
way back, because I don’t want you to look at other people in your industry, because then you’re going to be clouded by what you think you should be. And what you think the audience is looking for. What I do recommend people is look to other industries, look to people, places, things that inspire you doesn’t even have to be a business, it can be up in flour, you know, it can be anything, it can be, you know, a unique piece of paper that feels you whatever it is, look to things that inspire you. And then look inside and go, why? Ask yourself the better question like Why was I inspired by that? Like, why am I drawn to that place, that person, that thing, has nothing maybe necessarily to do the business, but that’s where you’re going to find out who you really are, and where your style comes from. And that’s what’s going to set you apart from all in I don’t believe in competition, I believe everybody should be a resource for each other. But that’s a whole nother segment, a whole nother
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] topic of conversation.
[Amy Lokken] That’s where you really because there’s a million people who do what we do. But you know what, we all do it a little differently. And you’re going to be attracted to me for my energy, and I’m going to be attracted to you for years. Like I love working with people who have that core, those core values of quality over quantity, all day long, who really are unapologetic for communication, and being self aware, and that desire to improve. We will always
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] and, and Amy, I think you and I are a perfect example of what you’re just saying, because you’re saying all these things. And I’m just smiling because it’s exactly the same way that I approach things. And I think it just shows that when you show up as yourself and you put yourself out there, then the people you connect with are at that same value space as you. And it doesn’t mean you have to agree with what we’re saying. But I’m saying when you show up the way that you you genuinely are then you get connected to people that are in alignment, they connect you to people that are in alignment, they connect you to the people that are in alignment, and you’re not all of a sudden building these relationships, whether it’s with customers, clients, or whatever, you’re building them with the right people, which feels so much better. Like, you know, I you could have shown up on this podcast. I mean, we talked prior but you could have shown up on this podcast, and I could have been sitting here going oh, no, that’s not how I want to show up for my listeners. But because you came from somebody that I know and trust, right? I know and trust that we’re going to have those same things. So I think that’s incredibly important what you just said video or not. So I love that. Well we close up our episodes with the same questions for every guest. So let’s run through those now, if you don’t mind. Let’s so as you have worked through your growth in your business and just your life kind of where have you turned to for personal development or for career development resources?
[Amy Lokken] You know, as I look to my community, the people who are in my space because they’re in my space for a reason, and it took me a few years, maybe a couple decades to figure that out. And then and that just comes with age and experience and really believing that i i in my heart of hearts don’t believe in regret as long as I’ve learned something From it, and then that means I have to dig really deep inside myself and, and reflect on on those past journeys, like it is how we stumbled through one that creates our next I fully believe. And and it’s a learning process, you know, but yeah, I It’s the people I surround myself with because we are the sum of the five people we spend the most time with. And if that’s not where you want to be, then you know, that’s a that’s a hard question to look inside. But we’ve all been there at some point in time that this isn’t the best. So it’s really going community and then inside.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] I love that. Would you consider yourself to be an introvert or an extrovert?
[Amy Lokken] Both actually, and there is a name for that. I just can’t think of it off the top of my head extra.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Extroverted introvert. Yes,
[Amy Lokken] that’s what I am.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Me too, I feel you there. Um, what is one thing on your goal list for the upcoming year either personal or professional.
[Amy Lokken] You know, it is moving my body twice a day. So I immediately get out of bed. And within five to seven minutes, my dog and I are on our morning walk usually in the 5am hour. And but moving pardon.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] It’s a bird.
[Amy Lokken] Yes, it was a little chilly this morning. I’m not gonna lie. But I’m moving my body twice a day with with one of them always including some type of a weight. So I did CrossFit for a while and things like that. And I really enjoy and the older I get, the more we should be doing a little more weight. So whether it’s actually with a barbell, dumbbells, free weights of any sort, or just bodyweight like I need to do that, because it sets me up. It sets me up for how my my day is going to go personally as well as professionally because it puts me in a different mindset.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] I just recently found on Netflix, sorry sidebar. Nike just put up all of their like 10 and 20 minute exercises that they think they used to be on an app I don’t know. But they have like a bunch of different setups. So you can go through like they anyway. They’re amazing. They’re like 10 to 15 minutes, and they usually don’t use any equipment but like you said, bodyweight So that’s been my thing, either in the morning or like in the middle of the day. If I know I have a lot of desk work, I can just go downstairs do a 10 minute workout on my iPad and be done with it. So absolutely. Tip there. No, I’m not sponsored by Nike, although that would be fun. What? Yeah, what is a piece of advice that you’ve gotten from someone that stuck with you?
[Amy Lokken] You will never regret being overdressed. And that comes from a boss of mine in you know, my my past doing high end interior design work. And thank you Bonnie Felts. I will always, always remember that and she couldn’t have been more true.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Similar to like, dress for the job you want not the job you have kind of concept mentally? Because,
Amy Lokken 28:26
yes, because it also puts you in a different frame of mind. So when you’re looking, going back to looking at, toward or to those people that you admire or whatever. There it is, like you can’t be anybody else but yourself. And yeah.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Awesome. What’s a non negotiable in your life?
[Amy Lokken] Oh, quality over quantity all day long, and communication. It really is everything it’s cracked up to be?
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] Yes, so true. Those are good words of advice, Amy. I love that. Well, this has been fabulous and wonderful. I love that you gave some very specific technical things that we can do to show up on camera better, and some ways to really look inward and how we develop our own personal style and the way that we show up. So thank you so much for being here. If people want to know more about you and connect with you, how do they do that?
[Amy Lokken] Email me is one of the best ways Amy at M UD modular mo d u l ar.com. Or LinkedIn is also a great place. So Amy Logan.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] I love it. And we’ll have everything linked up in the show notes for this episode at easy style with sammy.com/six. Amy, thank you so much for being here.
[Amy Lokken] Oh Sami thank you so much. This was so much fun. I think we could talk for a very long time.
[Sami Bedell-Mulhern] You’re absolutely right. So are you inspired to start doing video Amy has me so excited. I’ve Been holding on to a few things that I’ve been nervous to try specifically on LinkedIn. But think I’m ready now to just pull the trigger and get started. I have no problems going live in my VIP group. But I feel like because it’s such a small group, and they all know me so well, it’s not as scary but time to get out there. So I hope you’ll join me. Again, you can check out the show notes for this episode at https://easystylewithsami.com/6. You can also check us out on Instagram and Facebook for episodes and information there. And I really hope that you’ll leave us a review wherever you listen, it just helps us get in front of more people. And if you have a style story that you’d love to share, shout us out. firstname.lastname@example.org and we’ll catch you on an episode. We’ll see in the next one.
Getting comfortable with video is something that anyone in business needs, but many avoid. There are some easy ways you can set up your physical space, and your mental space, to make it easier and more successful.
Amy Lokken is here to share her tips with having your own style with your videos. She has some great resources and ideas to show up professionally and be the best version of you.
In this episode we discuss
- How to keep energy flowing even through the camera.
- Easy lighting and ways to set up your background
- The way you dress and how it effects your energy.
- Imposter syndrome
Want to skip ahead?
[4:50] Energy can still come through the camera – here’s how.
[6:55] Lighting tips and setting up your background.
[17:19] Imposter syndrome.
[24:18] Where Amy goes for learning and development.
[24:45] Is Amy an Introvert or an Extrovert?
[26:01] One goal for the upcoming year.
[27:50] Piece of advice that has stuck with Amy.
[28:46] What’s a non-negotiable?